Nothing feels better than a clean house. I started a bit after lunch and now sitting here at 4:00, the house is completely spotless. The dishes are washed, the sheets are changed, the toilet's been scrubbed, countertops wiped, floor vacuumed and yes, even the windows have been squeegeed. I even used anti-bacterial wipes from my uncle's dental clinic. Let me tell you now that those things can kill ANYTHING.
My parents told me last night that they would be coming up this weekend. It's nothing new as they've basically come up every weekend to see my grandma. It's kind of nice having them here on the weekends. These are the times filled with family and I really wouldn't have it any other way.
I had the chance to talk to one of my best friends this past week. It began kind of spontaneously but she ended up telling me something I really needed to hear. You see, coming up here, my parents had planned for me to spread my wings a little and take the time to make new friends and integrate myself into a new city. That was what they had planned. What has happened has only been the opposite. I don't really know the church community that I've chosen nor have I ventured out into the Edmonton night life in the evenings. Rather, these evenings have been spent in the hospital, at family dinners, at the airport, or at home cooking and cleaning. To be honest, despite the emotional rollercoaster, I've really enjoyed this time but a part of me wondered whether I was supposed to put myself more "out there."
She told me something I will not forget this summer. In the past year, she thought the same thing when she went on exchange to America's capital. She thought about making connections, putting herself "out there" and really truly living. What she found instead was a freedom within herself. She found that in those quiet moments - stumbling into beautiful neighborhoods, worshipping her God quietly at the back of a church, or reading a good book on the train to work - she realized the amount of freedom that she had in Washington. In those four months, she was allowed to do anything she wanted because chances were she would never see those people again. Those moments ended up balancing the "going out" ones and I know for a fact that though her time in Washington wasn't seamless, it was nothing short of memorable.
I choose this summer to spend with my family. I choose to put them first because these are the people closest to my heart. I may fight with them, complain to or about them but deep down I will always love them because they are always there for me. My parents planned this summer for me nearly a year ago. Who knew that all this would fall into place? Who knew that I would have the priviliege of being here to run errands, to pick up the slack, to spend this time with family? My aunt and I talked about God's providence on Thursday and though I'm still trying to find my footing with God, I know that His hand is still guiding, forever guiding.
trudyko | 
2 Comments
1 comment:
That's the attitude! I'm proud of you for sticking things out and even finding joy and beuty in circumstances you otherwise would not. Well, I've seen that you started posting again. Now I get to know what's happening with you. I know that still, things get hard at times and all I can give you is this:
"Consider it PURE JOY, [Tru], when you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance. Perseverance MUST finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything. If [you lack] wisdom, [you] should ask God, who gives gernerously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to [you]. But when [you] ask, [you] MUST BELIEVE and NOT DOUBT, because [if you doubt you] are like a wave of the sea, blown and tossed by the wind. [Then you] should not think [you] will receive anything from the Lord; [you will] be a double-minded [woman], unstable in all [you] do (James 1:2-8)."
I love you lots Tru! And God does too! JAck!
June 12, 2004 | Unregistered Commenter Jack
You're right, Tru. God really is constantly in our lives, and it's a good thing too! I think one of the best things in life is the term "coincidence." There are no coincidences with God - so i've decided to take Webster on and redefine it. Coincidence, to me, is that *click* when we get a peek at God's perfect timing in our lives. Once in a while the moons align and the puzzle pieces fit perfectly together. Your being in Edmonton at the same time as all this family stuff is happening.....that's a *click.* I'm proud of you for making your CHOICE. For exercising that free will, and for drinking in life for all its glory - on your terms.
June 12, 2004 | Unregistered Commenter An
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