Don't get me wrong. I am just as enthusiastic about the red and gold leaves and the white twiggy branches as the next lover of the 'dead months', but eating my dinner while the sun was still out tonight was strangely uplifting.
At 2:00 a.m. this morning, this side of the pond caught up with its North American counterparts. The result is longer days. These are days filled with promises of impromptu, because-I-can evening walks, dinner picnics at the backs, evening punts and barbeques along the bank of the cam. Blue-bells and daffodils have already covered the grass, and the other day I saw a giant bumble bee outside the UL (the bumble bees in this country are HUGE and ever so cute - sorry Dez, but they're just so furry!!).
Trite as it sounds, everything has its place in the cycle, and I would be deceiving myself if I didn't admit that a large part of me is looking forward to all those aforesaid promises. I think as we grow older, we learn to let go of the absolutes we use to define ourselves (I am a 'blue' person; I am a 'vanilla' person; I do not - etc.). We still have our favorites, those things that we prefer over others given the choice, but I think that eventually we learn that loving one thing does not mean rejecting the other. Preference does not negate the merits of the other options.
It's a pretty eye-opening way to live. And this 'coming into consciousness' is especially important for a girl who has built her life on many absolutes. Life is flexible and each thing can be appreciated in its own way. God has given us so many beautiful things, and I do believe that they outweigh the bad.
All this by way of giving thanks. My German friend often finishes his emails with the phrase: 'I am looking forward -' full stop. I find the grammar awkward but love the candid energy within this phrase. It is only now that I can appreciate such aposiopesis. That truncation is so potent - looking forward to what? In this context, to Spring and Summer I guess but in wider application, to so many of God's promises gestured at by the lengthening of this day - more days.
1 comment:
AUTHOR: An
DATE: 03/29/2007 04:21:00 PM
awww...what a 180, eh? Not that you have completely turned the dial but you really have grown, Tru. To take into consideration the things you wouldn't normally, to appreciate that which you aren't familiar with or to at least see the beauty in other colours...yay for springtime. I feel a lifting of my spirits too. :) Yay for sunshine and bumblebees!
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